No food for five days? Here’s what could happen.
If you write a book about something — anything — I will believe it is true. You could write a book claiming that shoving baby carrots in your belly button clears up back acne, and I would immediately start cramming carrots in my belly hole.
I don’t even need to read the whole book. I read the first quarter of Peter Attia’s book Outlive: The Science and Art of Longevity, and it mentions that fasting is an effective way to trigger some anti-aging processes. I also have heard both him and Tim Ferriss talk about doing five-day fasts at some point. Good enough for me!
So on Saturday (Day 0), I legally had to binge until I felt sick. I ate a frozen pizza, a family-size bag of chips, heaps of leftover Halloween candy, and three full-size Monsters throughout the day. A word of warning: do not drink that many Monsters unless you want your butthole to throw a fit.
And so, after staying up way too late with a fluttering, caffeinated heart, I weighed myself, clocking in at 178lbs. I crashed, then woke up on Sunday: Day 1 of the Fast.
DAY 1
I’ve done plenty of one-day fasts before, so this was no issue for me. I didn’t feel all that hungry — partially because I was still stuffed from the day before. My energy levels were great, and I felt relaxed and focused. I drank tons of water and ate ice cubes for snacks.
Nighttime weight: 174lbs. I’m assuming this was mostly water weight/bloating being shed.
DAY 2
The hunger begins. I woke up feeling fine, but the hunger ramped up pretty quickly throughout the morning. By the afternoon I felt a definite lack of food in my belly, but it wasn’t awful. I felt energetic throughout the day, but when I tried to work out at around 7pm, my heart told me that was not an option. A tiny amount of cardio sent my heart into a frenzy, and I felt immediately out of breath. I decided that I would not be working out for the remainder of the fast.
I got a little grumpy at around 8:30pm, which was expected. Strangely, that was the last time I was moody for the entire fast.
Night 2 was the first difficult part. I laid in bed thinking about how hungry I was, which made me lust even more for food. That progressively intensified each night.
Nighttime weight: 170lbs.
DAY 3
I woke up from a dream of food, but in the morning I didn’t feel particularly hungry. While working, I felt as energetic as if I had injected cappuccino directly into my heart, but I remained focused as well. Usually a nap would be in order in the early afternoon, but I had no inclination to sleep at any time throughout the day.
However, starting around 3pm, a lot of that energy was focused on watching videos of people cronching on KFC. I don’t even eat at KFC, but hot dang does that crunch sound appealing with a chronically empty stomach.
This was the second-hardest night. It took me at least an hour to fall asleep.
Nighttime weight: 168lbs.
DAY 4
I’ll start with the bad parts.
My mouth started having a consistent bad taste, even after brushing my teeth and tongue.
I couldn’t help myself from watching KFC mukbangs for legitimately 3+ hours. I’m gluten-intolerant and never really cook, but after watching a video about Snoop Dogg’s fried chicken, I impulsively ordered some flour that I would be able to eat. I visualized Friday’s gluttony with a dopey grin.
In the afternoon I had a teeny tiny panic attack, but it lasted maybe five seconds. The world felt like it was suddenly ending, and then just like that everything was fine once again.
I shat my pants. Just a little. You know when you let out a wet fart and then cut it off just a quarter-second too late? And then you slowly stand up and waddle to the bathroom to check if you did indeed commit an atrocity, because maybe it was just a really wet fart? But no. You know what you’ve done. The atrocity has been committed, and God are you thankful you’re at home and not in a public space.
I thought I would have expelled everything in my body within the first few days, but I sure was wrong about that. Daily diarrhea became the norm.
And now for the good parts!
While I again felt consistently energetic and focused, I also felt very at-peace. Minor annoyances had no effect on my good mood, and I felt like I could make very clear-headed decisions. I would hear people complain about things, and I would think to myself, “That is literally not an issue. No one, including you, will remember this next week.” The only negative feeling I had was…hunger. And it’s not that I was upset about it — I was hungry, sure, but not hangry. However, my girlfriend certainly got tired of me talking excitedly about KFC.
Nighttime weight: 166lbs.
DAY 5
Again, huge energy, big-time focus, many hours of mukbang-watching.
Did I shit myself again, just a little? Yes. Worth it for the energy-boost? That’s up to you.
I felt wonderful emotionally. Usually I want caffeine in the morning, but throughout the fast I never felt the urge to drink caffeine.
I ordered several gluten-free pizzas, which I refrigerated so I could annihilate them the next morning. I also bought a mega-size container of Top the Tater and several family-size bags of chips. No one’s perfect.
This was the toughest night in terms of hunger.
Nighttime weight: 165.5lbs. Overall weight loss: 12.5lbs.
Friday: The fast comes to an end
And so on Friday, I awoke feeling refreshed, and not actually all that hungry. I had intended to consume an entire pizza for breakfast, but I held back and ate only half a pizza. I am truly the picture of restraint.
I did finish the pizza an hour later. But you know what? I regret nothing.
Overall, this was a very positive experience. I lost 12.5 pounds and two pairs of underwear, and in exchange I buzzed with energy and focus for five days straight. A little chunk of fat lives on my bottom abs, and that chunk visibly diminished, which was exciting.
As of now, I plan to repeat this fast once a year, with shorter 3-day fasts once every few months.
Do I recommend trying this? Absolutely. If you’ve never fasted for an extended period before, I’d recommend doing a few 1-day fasts first. I typically fast every Sunday, but you don’t need to do it that often. Make sure to drink lots of water, and have ice cubes on hand to give your mouth something to do.
And don’t wear your favorite underwear.
